its a mad mad world so go hide somewhere quiet

I want to live here.
Live like her

That's my ultimate goal in life.
Peace

what a day

Assalamualaikum.
Greetings

Rambles. Words of today

1. Beauty and the beast

It used to be one of my favorite fairytale that i never bored to watch it again and again until the tape is ruin (apart from cinderella. i just hate snow white and sleeping beauty because all they have to do is sleep and been kissed). belle is a farm girl who love books (introvert alert) and kind heart. beauty with brain and big heart...sounds annoying right girl?

Anyway there's an issue in this country that have to banned the movie for its 'gay' issue. Whatever. 'These' people always do the weirdest things since KLCC is build. I see the movie today (of course i fly to singapore just to watch it =P) and yes, we have nothing to lose for not be able to watch it in cinema.

The idea of innocent woman turn a beast into human (Disney call it true love) can really be distracting. B.E.A.S.T...do you know what is that means?

1. predator animal who eat flesh (including human flesh) without even have a slightest sense.
we may forgive it as we know it is an animal. they don't think, they just eat.

2. a hideous creature that growl like a lion (or boar) and scares everyone just with their voice

and what human beast mean?

1. man (or woman. i don't want to be feminist here) who beat, torture people without a single sense of humanity. and one day maybe kill them

2. man (or woman) who have no slightest rationality, physcopath that scares everyone by their unrational judgemental (they can kill just because they want it)

3. human with hideous face, usually have thick hair all over their body and tough body

of course these are just my interpretation of beast. so in the real world, do you agree that beast live among us? (no, of course not like the america drama beauty and beast where the hero is damn gorgeous). man beat woman (or vise versa), husband kill wife (or vise versa), father rape daughter, mother lock and starve incapable child, a neighbourhood guy rape, kill an innocent passenger girl just because he is on high.... of course these are the real beast. and you think a fine, kind woman can turn them into human with the thing call 'true love'? of course not. in most cases i mean (yes you have to give a room for special cases but still the possibility is low).

with the high cases of violence happen everyday and now Disney remind us the shit about true love can change the beast into kind, warm heart handsome prince charming. so sweet (roll eye). do you ever heard of an angry man beat wife and then he ask forgiveness and then beat her again when he is angry again...the cycle go on and on just because the wife believe that her husband is innocent and does not mean all the beatings. they life in misery and confusion between love and domestic violence. this is really not right. one may have personality conflict that make him/her beat or torture people but it is still cannot be forgiven. what is wrong is still wrong. your action speaks louder than your words.

so beauty and the beast turn to be a fairy tales that despise me. and yeah (spoiler) the movie is just same as the animated one (1991). same songs and additional unnecessary character with emma watson as the spotlight (truthly, i kinda used to the beast look rather than the prince real face). and yeah, with a little bit of gay sentiment (duhh..i still don't get it why they should include it).

2. sherlock

dear readers, don't watch american drama because you all will be stuck for decade just to watch the ending (*cough supernatural). the perfect storylines is exaggerating in each season and making it even worse at the end (*cough how i met your mother).

i dont really watch tele (television) since my high school graduation. other than korean drama, i only used to follow CSI and Supernatural series.

so when AXN is getting supercool by broadcasting BBC original series of Sherlock, i stuck like a mad woman. the waiting for each season is f***ing killing me but it really worth. i am getting all excited again after watching first episode of season 4 that i plan to change my ringtone and wallpaper into sherlock again. wahaha. i know i am a bit late for season 4 because it is a first time i don't want something to finish too quickly because it is damn brilliant and exciting (i heard they will never make season 5).

if any of you not familiar with the series, i am telling you for each season they only got 3 or 4 episode. yes, only that my fellow kid, only that. you wont waste your time like 'why the dean is been killed by satan but been save by angel? is he a prophet?' or with the cliche of 'god, wardah. can you stop blaming your husband over small thing that kindergarten kid also know it is a hoax?' or 'dear chaebol, for godsake no one ever stares at girl drooling in her sleep and find it interesting. only psychopath do that'.

stop with the rambles farhana.

that conclude my day today. i am actually on an escapnism of the reality. i have to deal with unrealistic thing in my life with this realistic brain. because if i dont be realistic, i will be doomed.
shish...what am i talking about actually.

dear sherlock (aka benedict cumberbatch), i need you.
dont forget to bring your sarcasm.
and your cool high collar coat.

sleppless night

Assalamualaikum.
Greetings

My sleepless night begin with the letter Y.
Youtube

Of course everyone would go enthusiastic with it if they got free wifi.
I once finished studying two chapter in forecasting and at the same time watching Papadom 2.

So here, the recent videos that make me stuck into them for hours

1. Lee Dong Wook & Se Ho 'Love is an open door'

Yeay, i am in team grimm reaper! LDW used to be my crush for years when My Girl is getting hit through all over the world. So, of course i pass him over my hot charming Gong Yoo in Goblin (usually my crush is over when i meet someone else. in this case, tamaki hiroshi come up with the coolest chiaki shinichi character)

but well, as i going through the goblin x grimm reaper bromance i start to fond of his cuteness. haha. so yeah, he is so cute singing this song. and i can watch it hudred times but never tired.

2. Goblin

Here my favorite

okay, cut with the over fondness towards goblin

3. The baby which eventually had died

She is adorable. Sometimes, when it comes to kids video i am very sceptical of how actually a parent manage to grab their phone and take video (pretending that it is unintentionally). But this father is doing it intentionally, he try to interrogate his daughter to pick him as her favourite. His editing is fun synchronize with the baby action.

4. the man with the grocery bag

just watch it guys.my favourite is the 'tank man'. i feel like the man with the grocery bag is very cool in stopping violence.

5. Mean

Words are much dangerous than action. You can act like a normal school girl just chatting at the bus stop but actually doing the worst crime in teenage life. This small harassing is the origin of all the nightmare violence happen in society. The girl been bullied can be end up as psychopath, depressed person who take suicide or many possible outcome.

I feel a bit relieved that the bystanders don't stay quiet about it. yes maybe it just an experiment and maybe they are just acting but at least we as a viewer can get lesson over it. It maybe can give us courage to do the same thing when be in that situation.

6. Thinker studio

i always love thinker studio video (although i am not a subscriber because i am such a technology noob). motif viral, trol lala, burukcantik... these are my favourite channel and hungry for their video every damn week. they are like my sarcastic supplement in my boring life (because himpunan cerita lawak, sarcasm page had stop being sarcastic and repeat the same troll).

yes. i stop facebooking but youtubing instead (which i think much worst).
pftt..whatever

p.s: i mean youtubing as in watching youtube, not making video
p.s again : this is not a sponsored entry

It is a mad mad world in my mind

Assalamualaikum

Idea ni datang masa aku termenung di 'bilik termenung'.
Banyak je idea-idea lain yang selalu datang tapi aku tak suka jadi writer yang pathetic hanya tumpukan pada scene-scene tertentu (selalunya di awal cerita) sementara klimaks dan ending cerita kelaut dan cliche.

Jadi idea hanya tinggal idea.
So untuk ia jadi sebuah cerita penuh....maybe yes and maybe no.

Selepas setahun dia tinggalkan aku, hari ni dia balik.

Masa aku tengah makan tengah hari kat kafeteria cekik darah bawah bangunan ofis ni.

Maklumlah baru gaji.

Mungkin kerana aku baru gaji lah lelaki ini kembali pada aku.

“Hai, awak”.

Gaya dia tegur macam lelaki autism yang popular di Youtube tu. Macam tak ada apa-apa berlaku antara kami.

Aku pandang dengan muka tak berperasaan.

Pertama sebab sup ayam yang aku hirup memang tak sedap langsung.

Kedua sebab gaya tak berperikemanusiaan dia itulah.

Dia duduk di kerusi hadapan aku tanpa aku jemput. Tangan aku kat bawah meja mencapai phone di kocek baju kurung dan menguatkan volume suara lagu yang aku tengah dengar. Aku pandang nasi aku dan menyuap perlahan.

“Awak, saya nak cakap sesuatu ni. Saya tahu awak marahkan saya. Dan saya tiba-tiba muncul depan awak…saya tahu ia terlalu tiba-tiba. Saya datang nak minta maaf”,ucap dia dengan suara selembut cecair pelembut yang mak aku guna. Sayangnya suara itu tidak wangi.

Apa yang aku cakap ni?

Aku angguk perlahan. Masih menumpukan perhatian pada nasi aku. Aku bukan sedih, bukan marah, bukan pasrah.
Aku cuma malas.

Aku bukan gadis mengasihankan yang akan senyum selebar alam apabila dia berbicara, yang akan jadi chameleon, mengubah mood mengikut mood lelaki itu. Menjadi teman wanita yang memahami bila dia sakitkan hati aku atau tidak pedulikan aku.

Aku tak nak jadi wanita mengasihankan itu lagi.
Tapi aku bukanlah terlalu kuat untuk mengelakkan diri daripada dia.

Jadi…

“Awak dengar tak apa yang saya cakap ni?”,ucap dia memetik jari di hadapan mataku.

Aku pandang matanya, kemudian…

“Melepaskan….mu. Bukan mudah bagiku untuk melalui semua ini. Pabila kenangan kita mengusik jiwa dan hati….Kala malam tidurku tak lena terkenangkan mu….”, aku bersuara mengikut rentak lagu Sufian Suhaimi yang sedang kudengari di cellphone.

Dia hampir ternganga melihat reaksiku. Mungkin tak menyangka aku boleh jadi se-drama itu.

“Cuba pertahankan….separuh jiwa ku kini hilang terbang bersamamu…Episod hitam cintaku kini berulang kembali…Berulang kembali menguasai diriku ini…,”aku makin bersemangat menyanyi dengan muka tak berperasaan dan sudu yang sudah sudah bertukar menjadi mikrofon.

Sesaat kemudian, aku fokus kembali pada makanan di hadapanku.

Tak guna, memang tak sedap sungguh lauk hari ni. Bila nak habis ni?

Dia ketawa. Terhibur barangkali. Dia tak tahu aku sungguh malas melayan dirinya saat dan kala ini.

“Kenapa tak sambung sampai habis? Comel la awak nyanyi macam tu”,ucap dia tersengih-sengih.

“Saya maafkan awak. Awak boleh balik sekarang. Saya nak makan”,ucap aku dengan suara mendatar. Masih tiada perasaan.

“Saya tahu saya dah kecewakan awak dulu. Jadi sekarang saya nak tebus kesalahan saya. Saya nak kembali pada awak”,

Aku pantas tukar lagu dalam music player cellphone aku.

“Adakah kau rasa dunia isinya hanya kau yang punya? Kau fikir kau siapa?”,aku menyanyi terus pada bahagian korus. Peduli apa. Lelaki ni sudah keterlaluan. Dia buat selera aku mati terus. Aku pandang tepat pada matanya kemudian berdiri dan menghentakkan tangan pada meja.

“Adakah kau lupa ataupun kau buta kau dan aku hamba? Kau fikir kau raja? Kuasa harta wanita mengaburi minda mengotori jiwa dan bicara. Bila bicara bicaranya semua besar. Mendabik dada besar egonya. Lupa diri lupa pencipta yang Maha Besar. Hatinya hitam kelam terbungkam. Jiwa tak tenang kalah dalam menang”, aku menghabiskan nyanyianku dengan menghempuk kepalanya dengan beg sandang ku dan terus meninggalkan cafeteria itu.

Geram.

Makanan tengah hari yang paling tak sedap dalam hidup aku.

…………………………………………..