you are the fighter and perfectionist 2

Assalamualaikum.

I wonder why the coolest person that i admire before can turn like this.
yes, she being successful and everything but part of me screaming for her old self.
like seriously.

i really not in a position to say anything about her. forgive me. i do have my own flaw. i just pray that we all strive to be a good muslim, a good person. chaiyok girls.

continue with the list. yeah like anyone bother to know. like how anyone bother neelofa get the top awards in AME. ok, please stop talking about other people.

4. Miss H, the strict teacher. 

banyaknya masalah hang ni asenya tntg keluarga

its ok

stabilkan diri dulu

expectation family yang buat kamu penin ni..am i right?

pasal ckp2 orang luar jgn layan

Allah tak pernah salah atur, kamu kena yakin tu

Allah Maha Hebat, Allah takkan pernah salah or tak pernah letak sesuatu benda yang hang tak mampu

U know that right

Istighfar dear, selawat byk2

setiap apa yang berlaku ada hikmahnya, ada org dpt ujian lagi hebat

cari tempat yg buat kamu rasa tenang

bukan lari dr masalah tp bg kamu blh berfikir waras semula

segala masalah hang ni Allah yang boleh selesaikan semuanya

Al-Baqarah:186 Dan apabila hamba2-Ku bertanya kepadamu mengenai Aku maka (beritahu kepada mereka): sesungguhnya Aku (Allah) sentiasa hampir (kepada mereka); Aku perkenankanpermohonan orang yang berdoa apabila ia berdoa kepada Ku. Maka hendaklah mereka menyahut seruanKu (dgn mematuhi perintah Ku) dan hendaklah mereka beriman kepada Ku supaya mereka menjadi baik serta betul.

banyakkan baca Quran

baca sampai kamu cinta kepadanya

ingat semula kekuatan kamu masa kamu mula2 berubah

Garang tak cikgu H? Haha

5. Miss Alang the sister that you adore.

You have to clarify your target.Nak dapat kerja bidang you atau bidang lain yg you lebih enjoy

Masa muda ni terlalu berharga jgn biar berlalu tanpa you rasa puas dgn apa yang you dah isi utk masa muda you

Fardhu ain kena settle cecepat. Jangan tunggu ada masa lapang baru nk isi dengan daurah/kls agama. Kena ada peruntukkan masa utk settlekan urusan agama especially urusan fardhu ain.

Kena ada target yg you nk capai tahun ni, 5 tahun akan dtg & seterusnya.Bila ada target baru nmpk nk ikut jalan mana. Sebelum ada target kenalpasti dulu you nk dpt apa dlm hidup

nasihat dari kakak yang dah tua

All the things she said so true, and you already know. Yet you can read it in Solusi, or al-Ustaz. the different thing is she know you and care about you. that tarbiah sentap means to me.

6. Miss NS, the good writer. 

mcm akak dulu, akak just quit. because I like to think of the consequences later.

but 'berenti terus tak berfikir' ni kena ada pencetus. kalau takde pencetus, nanti bahaya. what i mean is, for me, masalah akak ialah "Oh my God, I am sick of all these actors and their stupid I-am-so-important statements. I have a degree in Political Science, what the hell am I doing???" dan kehidupan yg terlalu busy dan tak setimpal dgn kerja

but then bila bos kata yang "I need a writer that can also be a salesperson", itu pencetusnya

pencetus meaning that as you quit, you have this mindset that "I will prove you wrong". The survival mode kicks in

tapi kalau takde pencetus yg boleh buat survival mode kick in, tapi still rasa nak berhenti, just carilah kerja lain sementara awak still kerja kat tempat skrg

kalau tak, perasaan nak mengalah dan rasa you have make stupid decision tu akan jadi lebih kuat

tapi akak mmg salu berpegang pada kata2 ini.

your salary - in a way - is what your boss think you're worth

so are you worth that much pay? are you worth less? or worth more? What is your worth, to yourself?

Like me, I worth every hard work and laziness that I am. So that's why I do freelance. That way, I determine my worth.

harap membantu 

I always feels guilty to have disturbing her withe my problem. but sometimes..stranger do have the kick to move your brain to its right position.

7. Miss L, the good boss

i never want to stop you from doing what you want to do. even if i would be in the lost position.

but first you have to clarify and confident with the decision that you make

if you want to quit, what you gonna do? you gonna spend the whole time seeking job or continue with this job but at the same time seek job outside

if you want to do the second options you must arrange your time. let say every early month you had save the date to find job and go to interview. take one or two day rest. i don't mind so long as your annual leave is not finished yet.

the important thing is if you feel pressure with people, either you family or your co-worker, communicate with them. tell them how you feel, what you actually do to at least to fill up a bit of their expectation. show them and explain to them.

otherwise you will be in the same position and the problem never settled.

woah. i save Miss L for the last because she is really a good leader. thank you. well fyi she dont speak english to me actually. 

thats all for todaay. hapa kau ingat kau punya entri kira motivate gila mcm Aiman Azlan or Budak Tomato? 

well of course not. aku cuma nak bgtau diri aku akan datang yang apa2 pun situasi yg kau hadap, remeber these precious people including your parents. eventhough you have no guts to actually have a heart to heart chat with your mom or dad (seriously cringe) just know that they love you. and you have to actually find the chance, give the chance so people and fate can give you the same chance to your life.

read Quran. Solat!

you are the fighter and a perfectionist

Assalamualaikum.

My latest post seem to be unfinished. But oh well i don't want to elaborate my craziness towards that drama. enough already.

many things happen this week. i had clarify my problem to the best person to be referred to. without any drama like what i expect in my mind. yeah my mind already tell my heart to just chill but she always don't listen and be dramatic. pftt.

anyway this make my day. a personality test on facebook. i know they maybe just saying nice things to people so the page will go viral. but at least someone make effort to support you. even if it is a computer. pftt..

1% of the population:You are a fighter and a perfectionist!

How rare is your personality? Only 1% of the population has your strong mind, soul and spirit. 

Your most defining traits: You set high standards and you achieve them (yet you don't see it), you are a control freak and you are flawless in everything you do. 

You have a strength and fighting spirit that few can match. You're strong, determined, dedicated, and willing to sacrifice for what you believe in. You are incredibly courageous and fight hard to achieve your goals. This type of warrior spirit goes along with your perfectionism. You always try to do the best work possible, and you inspire others to do the same. 

Possessing this combination of traits, has taken a long toll on your life, and we think you should try to relax a little, even take a short vacation, you will feel better, trust us!

First, yeah i don't believe in that 1% of the human population. it is maybe because i prefer to be an outcast in a crowded place. that makes me a weirdo that nobody can understands.

anyway yeah keep fighting. these are some wisdom words i get from people around me:

1. Miss S, the silent awesome friend. she is someone that have her ear for me and without actually saying any words. yes, i rant to her and avoid her from saying anything and she did it. what a straightforward friend. she make me realise that i have to grow up, stop be a crybaby and solve the problem. yeah, sometimes she just say 'haha' for my over dramatic reaction so yes i should chill like her.
of course sometimes we swap our position (she being drama about her problem) and i just giving her a brief opinion that make her calm down a bit. as simple as that.

2. Miss F, like the mother or sister that you want.

if you are upset on not achieving sth, just remember tht everything hv time zone. slowly when the right time comes, it will naturally happens.

and doa2 selalu, kita mmg tak lari dr salahkan Tuhan.

and yes tuan2 dan puan2, tak baik salahkan Tuhan. 

3. Miss Fau, the kdrama expert & relationship specialist.

Its okay, dear. kuatkan semangat.take your time.

kita mmg takkan dpt nk puaskan expectation org lain.

chaiyok dear..may Allah ease our journey...amin Ya Allah

I pun mcm tu, mcm stress sgt. down, nangis, hampir putus asa.

orang ckp apa pun I kejap je positive, then down lagi

then i told myself  "ko mintak kat Allah utk jdi hamba yg sentiasa sangka baik dengan takdirNya. Nah..sblm jd mcmtu mmglah Allah uji..tgk ko sangka baik x dgn ujian Dia".

Someone told me, "dont ever give up. sbb takut jd kufur nikmat"

memang serabut dunia ni, serabut sgt.

Take your time utk pulihkan semangat

Ada org yg lg hebat Allah uji. Mcm ustazah hafizah musa pesan "kita kena belajar redha dgn kehidupan dunia. Just go with the flow"

Kita memang perlukan each other utk saling mengingatkan.

So sweet kan manusia2 ni. Haha. Well ada lagi. Entri lepas ni la pula ye. 

the time traveller's wife

assalamualaikum.

nampak tak kelcelaruan di situ bila post entri dua hari berturut2. macam orang tak ada life.
haha.

yeah mmg takde pun. anyway letak life tu kat tepi dulu.

sbnrnya aku bkn tgk pun cite the time traveller's wife tu. i am talking about tomorrow with you drama. boy oh boy how can i explain it with words the anticipation, excitement ... it really can catch up the drama hit goblin (which is airing before tomorrow with you).

i swear to myself that no drama can beat goblin. yes that's true but TWY has its own strength which undoubtedly make you burn your midnight oil for it.

i swear again to stop watching drama after the goblin fever because duhh i need to get a life. but i really don't expect to be this restless for it.enough saying.

reasons why i dont want to watch TWY at first;
1) because duhh i can see clearly it is a melodrama. i need an upbeat drama like strong woman do bong soon
2)i dont like shin min ah. because she pretty (stupid reason) and i dont like her character in 'oh my venus (again because she too pretty to be fat). ohh yes, because she took gary from ji hyo when she came RM. i hate that pretty face
3)i hate je hoon too. because he is so slay in RM. and other variety & entertainment show. i cant accept he doing aegyo

but 8tv is crushing my pure ambition to not watch that melodrama by repeating the ad back to back like seriously. i was curious and that's how it all started...

things i like about it:
1) god i love both character a lot! yeah ma rin has a pretty face but so thoughtless about life (but still how come that pretty face can't succeed in acting career. so unbelievable). i would hate her but somehow she is interesting by her unique weird cute character. so joon become the most relaxing chaebol in dramaland as he don't involve with complicated family matter.the most cool time traveller. haha. i like that somehow although they dislikes each other at first (as usual) they still look very sweet together. like ma rin do not hesitate to act cute in front of him as if to seduce him. and yeah he also do things that obviously show he attract to her.

ohh...do number one seems too long?

whatever, i like this drama because of their character.

they seem awkward at first (but not so awkward to have first night together). so joon really seems to regret the marriage by some of his action while ma rin innocently loving her husband and act like immature lady. but as the story progress the only key to love each other is to know each other well.

i also feel like ma rin is a clingy woman that suffocate her man. like seriously you don't have any matter to do with your own life? yes he is handsome and rich so you are acting like you just winning a lottery number just to make sure he will be yours forever? pfft

but she really has her own point. i really never been on a relationship before (ouch burn!) but even if you be friend with someone you should know he/she well so that both of you can help each other when facing a harship in life. so does marriage.

thankfully that man dont take much time to fall in love with her and learn to actually love someone. at first he try to be the cool man but eventually his silliness occur when sometimes dealing with the immature wife. i love the sweet yet funny scene and it is not awkward at all. it is really like both actor and actress fall in love with each other (i can't see the romantic BTS video because i feel sorry for kim won bin).

and the storyline....oh key i need to finish up my drama marathon. till then. bye.

p.s: you should sleep!

crying over a split milk

crying for stupid reason

1. when watching 1 litre of tears

aya and asou kun is the most pure couple in dramaland.and they do it in a simple yet cool way. 

2. when reading 'aku kan novelis' by nurul syahida

you know the saying of 'the person who laugh a lot had the saddest life ever'? safiah always being cool and have fun with her job and friends. but who knows she actually had a sad first love story. i dont know, i just cry when she visit fakri grave and said she need to move on but she will never forget him. 

3. when reading 'bukan kerana aku tak cinta-iman sufi'

yeah surprisingly. i know. dont watch the drama, it ruin the real writer imagination of jebat (i want louis khoo really really bad). i cry when mas reading jebat's last letter when he go out afraid of not coming back. 

i really thought it has sad ending. how dense i am.

4. when listening to edcoustic song

many of their songs really catch my heart like a venom strike. haha so hiperbola. 

5. when watching cinderella step sister

i feel you eun jung when you have to pretend being strong and cold heartness but inside you are so broken. when she's being apart from err that hero character and when they finally met again...sob sob. moon geun young become korea sweetheart is not a bluff.

6. when watching 'hot young blood'

days ago i was into park bo young because of her cute character in strong woman bong soon. i rewatch HYB and oh dear i really love when she sacrifies herself for her coward first love. love story of people in the past really worth to be applaud.

7. when i am homesick

that was back in 2011. duhh, perak and johor seems like las vegas and malaysia. i call my father (or is it he call me first?) and cry to him. lol. really funny.

back in 2000 when i was apart from my mom that having her delivery at kuala lumpur, i cry for her that my uncle had to send me there and i nearly a month break from school. 

*i wish i could do that too with my job hoho

8. when i miss my friend

i did this a lot. 

in form 1 (missing my primary school friends and teacher), in degree life (when i move to main campus shah alam)...a lot of time actually but two of above is the worst. funny when i go to siti badariah's room and suddenly burst a tear for missing our friends back in diploma life.

9. when goblin finish

i cry like hell. that the most epic korea drama that make me waiting in front of the lappy every friday and saturday to watch every new episode. and when it finish, i feel empty like the hole in the wall. 

10. when watching the ending of 'scarlet heart'

whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy dear whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy u guys dont meet in future. why must the girl feel the guilt although all she do is loving the guy till the end. at least King So get to see his daughter grew up if he miss Hae soo but Hae soo need to go back to future and settle her second life there. why oh whyyyy

k, stop this foolishness.

Te edge of twentie five

You know the movie the edge of seventeen. Somehow the main character really get into me.

She is someone that resent the normality of the world, at least in the teenage circle life.

'Everyone post something, put picture on the facebook like anyone care... pftt'

'Oh god am i being like people that think they are so important'

Her rebellious character is so sarcastic and adorable. And her attitude start to change when people that she trust give shit to her.

Well actually that's how she grow up and be a more reasonable person.

So what is your point my dear?

I dont know but i also feel like that. I resent all the normality around me. 9 to 5 job, having a boyfriend or someone i wish to marry (just so you know it is totally different with crush. I had crush with lots of people but dont mean i would marry them). The normality of a typical malay girl that if you dont do the above thing, you will be bitched by those mak cik2 that really dont know the exact amount of ptptn you have to pay.

So yeah i am not hostile. I am annoyed. The neverending annoyance.

I dont know the judgement of people today. Like so stupid.
"You working in kl with salary not more than 2k? Fantastic"
"When are you going to move on from your 1.1k of job and stay at your hometown?"

People dont ask if a person actually got saving on their little salary or actually pay their education debt. They dont ask the hell the kl worker of their hell time stuck in the traffic for hours.

Or some people
"You are government worker? Fantastic"
"You do business. Hmm ok, just dont disturb my wassap or fb with your product"

You know how annoying it is?