Talking serious stuff

Assalamualaikum.

Greeetings

Too many things i want to rant. randomly. 

But i will start with this first

1. Two days before i went to the bank and while waiting for my number, i am secretly listening to a conversation between a man and a boy behind me. Apparently the boy decide to quit his study to work. Maybe he had some money issue that forced him to work at cinema to get income. The man adviced him to think about it again as he only got one year left to graduate. 

I am not opposing the fact (that the man mention) of getting a certification is crucial in finding a good job. But I just pissed off with his opinion about the lower class worker (such as fast food restaurant, cinema) as a 'kerja budak-budak'. According to him, a matured human being should do a mature job such as lawyer, banker or other job that has a secure epf and working in office hour.

Well mister, i see many those 'mature' human being doing the most stupid action and speech that a human can do. All of us has many stories that such stigma should not be exist. A low class worker not necessary a stupid, indecent and unlucky so does the upper class worker not necessary has a happy life story. 

Then, I come across to this video today. And suddenly it make me think about this issue even deeper.

The murder of Jalil Ibrahim: The guy who knew too much

To be short, this case happen in 1983 (if I am not mistaken) and create a massive issue in  Asian financial and politics scandal. An innocent auditor is murdered by a high influence people, the plot that we usually see in drama but really happen in reality. How an educated and high integrity person risking his life and family for the sake of his job. Maybe this is what the man (in my story above mean). A true job is when we are risking important thing in our life to actually give something to the society. A job to make us be responsible and mature in life.

The company that been associated with this case, Carriane is said to involve in huge fraud and scandal that lead into its destruction few years later. I just wonder, if there is many high class worker is as sincere and responsible like Jalil Ibrahim, maybe a company like Carriane could never exist. We, the youth who said to be the think tanker of nation end up being a 'comfortable' employee and never dare to make change for a better.

It make me feel bad. I am waiting for a chance but never dare to step out of my tiny world. This world is under destruction and yet the youth still amused with those Fatah Amin story, gadjet spinner (is it the right spelling) and other unnecessary stuff. I just... I dont know. Things are not right but I dont know how to fix it.

Today I happen to encounter to few people with their kids. It just cross my mind that.... being a married woman and live in a low class world is not what i want.  I know it sound absurd but I rather be alone and lead a small but meaningful life. I dont want to create another problem to this world if I am not responsible enough to handle it.

Yesterday, I dream to change the world.
Today, I am still in the same position. With some bad luck of life.
Tomorrow, ...I just can't think.

chance

assalamualaikum.
greetings.

jadi raya ni, cuba teka soalan apa paling femes ditanya oleh saudara mara tanpa mengira usia dan jantina bertanya pada orang muda?

"Bila nak kahwin?"

Salah!
Jadi jangan stereotype dengan orang tua ye. Mereka juga sudah matang untuk tidak bertanyakan soal itu kerana takut menjadi bahan umpatan dia Muka Buku mahupun Pencicit.

"Buat apa sekarang?"
"Kerja mana?"

Itu dia soalannya.
Dan ada dua reaksi saja pada soalan diatas.

Mereka yang dikatakan mempunyai kerjaya kukuh dan semat (baca: kerja ofis) akan bangga menjawab soalan tersebut.
Mereka yang masih terumbang-ambing dalam pemilihan kerjaya pula akan berpeluh untuk menjawab soalan tersebut.

Well, aku termasuk dalam kategori kedua. Kadang-kadang aku malas memanjangkan perbualan tersebut kerana tipikal orang tua akan 'cuba' membantu anda menyelesaikan masalah (walhal ia bukanlah satu masalah pun. kerja halal, dapat duit, bayar pt).

"Ohh kenapa tak cari kerja yang sama dengan course belajar?"
"Kawan mak cik ada kerja kat KL dia kata nak pakai orang kat butik dia"
"Buka je Jobstreet takkan takde"

Which kadang-kadang aku menjadikan aku hilang sabar dan pura-pura ambil air di dapur.  I won't debate on this (again). They have the right to ask and I have the right to keep quiet.
Maka jangan tanya kenapa aku seperti berura-ura menjadi seorang anti-sosial.

Tapi semalam, aku tengok video baru kyopropaganda (bangga sebab antara yang pertama tengok dalam jarak upload lebih kurang 3 minit yang lalu). Ia adalah sebuah reaction video ( i am glad dia ada sentimen takkan jadi macam youtubers lain yang suka buat reaction video pada benda-benda bodoh). tapi dia still nak ikut trend itu sebab dia rasa ada satu video ni sangat best untuk dikongsi.

Ia video "the opportunity" dari thailand. basically ia sbnrnya iklan tentng insurans tp banyak yang kita boleh belajar daripada situ. Ia berkisar tentang seorang wanita yang bercerita tentang 'peluang' yang dia dapat. Dia bermula dari kosong, sebagai seorang ibu yang kehilangan anaknya yang sakit (kerana tiada duit dan kesempatan untuk merawat anaknya). Tapi dia bangkit dengan bekerja menjual insurans dan dia berharap orang lain takkan rasa penyesalan yang dia rasa. i mean yes kau boleh sembang bertapa pentingnya cinta dan kasih sayang tapi kau juga tak boleh nak gebang besar kalau kau tak ada duit pun nak beri makan, beri perlindungan pada orang yang kau sayang. duit bukan segalanya tapi segalanya perlukan duit. Mak cik ni belajar untuk kongsi peluang yang dia dapat (ada kerja, ada duit) pada orang susah yang lain (dia bagi roti pada pengemis).

Iklan tu tak sedih pun, tapi cukup untuk buat kau berfikir tentang peluang yang datang dalam hidup kau. Quote Kyo, kau boleh jadi apa sahaja yang kau nak tapi mestilah disertai dengan usaha. Dan kalau kau nampak peluang, ambil saja walaupun ia taklah memberi impak besar pun dalam hidup kau.

Ia buat aku fikir, apa sebenarnya yang aku nak dalam hidup. Kita selalu rasa orang lain rendahkan kita sebab kita bukan siapa-siapa (baca: merujuk soalan mak cik pak cik di hari raya), selalu rasa down bila orang lain bercerita kejayaan masing-masing. Kita jadi skeptikal dengan hidup sebab selalu dirundum malang sampai kadangkala kita terlepas banyak peluang. Many door had opens to us but we dont dare to step in because of many reasons. Aku tak sedia lagi, aku tak boleh buat ni, aku tak boleh buat macam tu, apa kata si polan,....too many reasons.

Hati kita tahu bila kita nampak peluang tu. Kita mungkin akan tersalah buat pilihan tapi sebenarnya jalan tulah yang akan jadikan kita lebih baik dari semalam.

If you want to be a writer, write something. Find your own writing style, find a good perspective of life, find a good story yang sebenarnya ada kat sekeliling kau. You will be rejected many times but don't give up.

Itu contoh yang aku rasa paling tepat untuk aku. Tapi kadang-kadang pun aku sendiri tak tahu apa yang aku nak. Sebab itu bila fikir-fikir balik, soalan mak cik pak cik di hari raya itu tak salah. Malah ia soalan yang paling bernas untuk ditanya pada semua orang.

Apa yang kau nak buat dengan hidup kau? Apa passion kau? Apa yang penting pada kau, kebahagiaan atau kemewahan (dan tidak salah memilih keduanya)? Orang yang pandai akan berfikir dan bertindak. Orang yang bodoh hanya akan meroyan di sosial media.

You yourself should know of yourself. Stop watching drama and hope someone will rescue you.

Itu je untuk kali ni. God, apa ajelah yang aku emosikan ni. Bye.

angry bird

assalamualaikum.
greetings.

aku pernah ditanya oleh seorang rakan lelaki di universiti (rakan as in working partner)
"macam mana nak tahu awak tengah marah?" (yeah, so skema 'saya-awak'. but we're in formal club meeting that's why it is 'skema')
"saya diam"
dia angguk tapi aku tahu dia masih konfius sebab personaliti aku memang pendiam (especially with man) jadi adakah itu bermakna aku sentiasa marah?

seorang lagi rakan lelaki sewaktu aku di seremban sempat mengutuk aku dihadapan junior kami
"tengok senior awak kak farhana tu. tunggu kami dua jam pun sabar je, tak reti nak marah langsung".
memang kurang asam.

aku teringin nak jadi watak perempuan yang boleh luahkan perasaan dengan jujur; marah sedih gembira. aku bukan nak kata aku tak pernah marah tapi sejujurnya diam ketika marah adalah lebih baik. at least untuk diri aku sebab once aku dah naikkan suara pada seseorang aku akan rasa tubuh aku menggigil dan menangis. i really can't do it.

dan bekerja dalam bidang khidmat pelanggan sangatlah mencabar untuk seorang introvert seperti aku. maksudnya dalam apa-apa situasi yang emosional seorang introvert memerlukan masa bersendirian untuk mengecas segala urat yang berselirat dalam otak dan hatinya. aku pilih untuk diam kalau aku tengah marah dan elakkan diri dari bercakap atau bertembung dengan orang lain.

tapi macam mana kalau kau terpaksa juga berinteraksi dengan orang yang membuatkan emosi kau tak stabil (marah)?
aku bukanlah orang yang terbaik dalam pengurusan emosi tapi mungkin tips2 di bawah aku boleh kongsikan kepada mereka yang rasa mereka sangat emosional dan cepat sentap.

1. dalam semua keadaan, cuba bercakap dengan suara yang rendah (tanpa tone) dan sedikit lambat-lambat. ia akan nampak kau macam malas nak layan orang tu tapi ia lebih baik daripada meninggikan suara. cuba cover dengan senyuman plastik. aku rasa gaya bercakap yang sedemikian boleh buat kau bertenang seketika dan berfikir dengan lebih rasional.

2. kalau perlu diam sebentar, pandang tempat lain. kau kena kawal diri kau dulu sebelum kau nak kawal orang yang sedang melancarkan perang emosi dengan kau. kalau perlu minta bantuan orang lain kalau kau rasa pelempang kau terasa sangat ringan untuk dilekapkan ke pipi manusia tersebut.

3. orang akan jadi emosional jika dia rasa tergugat, kerana itu dia akan cuba menggugat emosi kau juga. dalam customer service line, customer is not always right. but customer is always a customer. jika dia seakan tidak makan saman dengan penerangan berjela kau, jump into the solution of the problem. contoh;

customer: tapi poster promotion tu ada kat bawah buku tu, supposely la buku tu ada promotion
staff: minta maaf tapi puan perlu tengok gambar dan description kat poster tu. ia lain dengan barang yang puan amik ni. setiap promotion yang kami ada akan dilekatkan skali dengan sticker
customer: ah...mana boleh macam ni awak kelirukan customer

kau memang rasa nak cekik bunuh sula manusia jenis ini. percayalah ayat yang mereka lontarkan kadangkala lebih teruk dari ini ditambah carutan. sebab tu kau kena bertenang dulu. orang bodoh bertindak guna emosi, orang pandai guna otak. jadi tak guna berdebat dengan emosi tersebut, just jump to the solution

staff: baik, saya rasa ini semua salah faham. puan tersalah tengok gambar produk ni dan mungkin staff kami juga tak perasan poster ni dah beralih. jadi sekarang puan nak buku yang ada promotion atau yang tak ada?

dalam situasi yang sukar, mereka mungkin takkan mahu mengaku kalah. jadi penting untuk kau jadi tegas dalam lembut.

staff: minta maaf ye puan kami memang tak boleh bagi harga ni. puan boleh decide untuk ambil atau tak

dan semua aksi diatas haruslah dibuat dengan tampalan senyuman plastik saiz A4 dan bahasa tubuh yang polite. kau mungkin akan dianggap kalah jika diukur dengan panjang teks debat dan kelantangan suara namun ketahuilah jika momen itu dirakam dan diulang tayang semula pada masa depan, at least normal human will feel embrassed to see themselves fighting for a little thing.

trust me, itu apa yang aku rasa bila aku pernah marah & tinggikan suara dengan parents aku. masa tu aku rasa aku betul, aku menang tapi bila aku ingat balik serius aku malu dengan diri aku sendiri. what if anak aku pun akan buat macam tu kat aku. situasi yang sama jika kita buat pada orang lain hatta kucing sekalipun. bumi ni bulat bila-bila masa saja kita boleh bertukar kedudukan dengan orang lain.

jadi jangan main angry birds, tak best pun. apa barang tembak khinzir, lebih baik kau tembak askar AS yang ceroboh Iraq tu hah. Fighting like a man, like tentera Al-Qassam.

Dan itu juga buat aku berfikir, kalaulah Rasulullah s.a.w boleh pinjamkan sedikit sabar baginda pada manusia akhir zaman ni. This world would be in peace forever.

k,bye

sawatdee

assalamualaikum. greetings.

there are few things that i learned these day.
in thailand 'khun' (means you) is used for a respectful person (formal language), while 'p' is for informal language (usually among friends).
and thai people also make their greetings short as sawatdee (sawadikap is the long version).

useless thing that i learn, right?
well i did learn from thai drama that suddenly caught my interest. to tell you the truth some of them seriously much better than our lame malay drama and also korean drama (i stop watching suspicious partner just to finish a thai drama. marathon style).

so this entry is like a review of two drama that i watch. i am not promoting them, i just want to highlight some interesting point out of the drama.

1. fai lang fai (fire versus fire)

ohh i really love woman revenge drama (i did mention about 'temptation of wife' Philippine in my last entry did i?). dramanice just updated about new drama they sub and i just click randomly this drama (which actually aired in 2015).

first, i just mesmerised the beauty if the heroine. seriously how can a woman seem so flawless. i like her expression, her style which i feel like too good to be true (seriously she had tons of bold dress that i don't think people in hot country like thailand would wear. well except if you got umbrella and air condition with you all the time).

the first episode is like watching a tamil plus indonesia drama. they got stunt that seriously i feel cheesy (rolling on the road to save a woman, staring at her beauty when the truck is fucking near them). but i give it a chance, at least i finish the first episode. and the revenge story is just... make my mouth open. a man who want to take revenge of his former company partner slash best friend. he mention to his daughter (the heroine named leela) she should get him back a land cost 100 millions.

just to mention to you guys that the women drive a bmw sport car and for god sake she can just sold her car plus maybe a share of her own designer company to buy that land. but as always, drama dont use easy method. so she plan to approach the enemy's family by seducing his son and his son in law. plus messing with his arrogant daughter and the wife. but the hero (named narut) who initially have good relationship with leela turn into her enemy as to protect his family. and yes, you can guess when a fierce woman fight with a cool guy, they usually fall in love.

what i like about this drama is the strong character of leela. she is beautiful with fierce character. and i am glad that the character still preserve the asian woman culture that never give up to a man easily. i mean she never let narut kiss her (except at the head) like a lowly korean, american drama. a few scene that i think if it was a korean drama they probably had been kissed wildly or sleep together. there is actually a sex scene in this drama (about a secretary that sleep with few man and seducing his boss, and also actually leela is sleeping with narut) but they dont show it. which i do thank god a lot because nowadays korean drama has a lot of it (i miss the innocent old korean drama like full house and my girl).

this is a cliche revenge drama but some of the character is really interesting and the lines also amusing. for example a wicked secretary that seem want to be a femme fatale. she sleep with many men and seducing her boss which nobody could expect that with her innocent-specky appearance. she make evil plan with various man, pick a fight with the upper class ladies  as she want to enter the high class society.

the lines that caught my attention is in the middle of luk yee (the daughter of the enemy) marriage crisis, both of her parents suddenly show up to plead her to eat and start to discuss about some nutricious food (yeah, weird). she look at them with a naive look and said she adore how her parents still being lovely to each other. she take them as example and figure out how to manage her marriage crisis.
another line would be 'i hope for 'dissapointment' today, but dont make me hate you'. yes when you want to broke up with someone, just said it directly. no need to be a bitch that say hurtful words.

lastly, i love the twist story about the revenge. it actually make sense for a man to plan a huge revenge not merely because of a land. overall, i like the storyline, i like the main character...although seriously some part really really dramatic and cliche.

2. full house (2014) thailand version

first of all, why thailand man character seem so 'jambu'? i mean nickhun 2PM can be manly and still popular, why the other thai guys had to be such a 'gay'? and worst of all, why they even have fans?

i warning you guys, this drama also had a really 'ladylike' looking guy which will make you annoying. it can't even be compared with the manly bi rain (full house korea version). it only can be forgiven as the heroine is super cute and sassy.

i would say this woman has lead the story to different aura than the korean version. she is not trying to become song hye kyo but make her own version of han ji eun. she had the same cute and sassy look (frizzy long hair) from the beginning till the end (han ji eun character change into feminine at the end of story). i would say oum-am character is much positive, smarter and calmer than han ji eun. the best part is how she struggle to become novelist and scriptwriter. compared to han ji eun who always type random thing on her laptop, oum-am always discussing about what she actually write with p'guy (the producer). she always read books and write random stuff on note book which is actually the habit of a real writer. like p'guy said he admire he her passion to write although she is far from be a good writer.

i love how they change the sequence of storyline, and some character but still preserving the original story. i would say this is the lighter version than the korean version and successfully highlight the thailand culture. but like i said earlier, this version have different aura than the korean version and no one is better than another. i still like han ji eun character at certain part and can't forget some of my favorite scene from full house korea.

the annoying side of full house thailand is just there are too many brands they are promoting like alicafe (why the hell malaysia brand is here?), febreeze and many more not to include korea tourism campaign. why you make such lovely story into an ad? urgh!

last but not least i just want to say....boku unmei no hito is finished!
my oh my i really love the story, so simple yet sweet.
as always i prefer japan drama than the other because of their simple yet brilliant ideas.
and most of them are still preserving asian culture (no wild kiss, sex scene). although i know the reality is they show that kind of stuff everywhere in the country (sex mags, and sex tools are easily available in japan).

but lets take the bright side. almost all my forever favorite drama come from japan (nodame cantabile, one litre of tears, rich man poor woman).

back to the drama, seriously it like watching a step by step tutorial in dating in a simple yet sooo romantic way. plus, destiny is playing its miracle in the main couple's life which make the story much much much more intersting.

i bet you will smile a lot as if you are the one who dating the guy.

at least much better than suspicious partner. yeah, you hear me writer-nim. i am so dissapointed that you make the two character sleep together. why ji wook has to sleep with his partner at almost all drama he starring in. don't make him a jerk actor.

well then, i should stop bickering now. bye.